Odie catches a squirrel
Odie could not believe it! The stupid squirrel had pushed his luck, right in Odie’s back yard, and Odie had caught him between his jaws.
He’d dreamt of this day! He’d seen squirrel after squirrel manage to disappear around a tree, or up a pole, running along the wire like some mad ninja. Odie could swear he heard them laugh as they ran off, but he knew it couldn’t be so. Squirrels, after all, are stupid.
“Squirrel no talk. Not smart, like dog.” he’d think to himself as the damned thing would escape time after time.
But not today.
Odie had imagined this day. Biting the squirrel so hard that his eyes popped out. Chewing his head as the squirrel screeched, which Odie would relish.
Odie’s jaws clamped down.
“I… I have a family!...”, he heard the squirrel say.
The voice threw him off. It was female, which he hadn’t expected.
“I just… want to live… for my children…”.
Odie felt his jaw relax. How could he kill a mother? Who would care for her “pups”?
He let the squirrel go slowly. As soon as she felt the teeth ease up she looked in Odie’s eyes for a moment, then bolted so fast Odie lost track of her. She rushed up a pole, turned around, looked at Odie.
Their eyes locked, then she shook her nuts are him and yelled “SIKE, you fucking simp!’, then ran off across the wire laughing.
Odie looked on, thinking to himself “She should no curse, she has pups.” before walking back towards the back door.
He caught a squirrel. That was enough.
*Odie, post drink :-(
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